Do you remember the first time you got naked with your beloved?
Along with the passion of the moment, if you’re like most of us, you were probably a bit self-conscious. After all, for the first time, you may have had had to reveal that paunch you’d been hiding, those patches of cellulite or that outie belly button you’ve hated since the third grade.
But because you overcame those concerns and let yourself get naked – well, I don’t need to remind you what happened next!
The point is, when you allow yourself to get financially naked with your partner, amazing things can happen. You not only have a better understanding of one another, but you’ll also work better as a team to achieve your goals and tackle your problems.
It turns out that being clear and open with each other about financial issues is one of the most positive things you can do to ensure a “happily ever after.”
Couples May Argue About Sex, Kids and In-Laws, but It’s Their Arguments About Money that Best Predict Whether or Not They’re Headed for Divorce Court…
But that can be avoided by getting and staying financially naked with one another. Whether you’ve been together for 30 years or just entered a committed relationship, it will do wonders to enhance your intimacy and trust.
But how do you do it?!? For many couples, raising money issues is like lighting a match to see if your gas tank is empty!
It doesn’t have to be. Just in time for Valentine’s Day, these three tips will keep your money discussions positive and productive:
1. Recognize that Money Is an Emotional Issue
For many men who are wired to be providers, money brings up issues of self-worth, so they take financial conflict more to heart than their partners might. For many women, money represents security, so problems or disputes about money can bring anxiety and even fear of survival.
So, we’re not just arguing about whether $3,500 is too much to pay for a golf vacation. We’re defending our self-worth or even our survival!
Tip: Choose a time when you’re both relaxed and not rushed. Begin the conversation with something like, “I know our finances can have a great impact on the health of our relationship. I’d like to start talking about money so that we understand each other and can get on the same page.”
You can also start by taking our Love and Money Financial Self-Assessment, and then encourage your partner to, as well.
2. Discuss Basic Attitudes
Our basic attitudes come from our families, our cultures, our peers, even television! Some of us are natural savers and long-term planners. Others have a “live for today” attitude. Some people are comfortable with debt, and others wouldn’t dream of buying with anything but cash. To some, money means power while to others, it means love.
Tip: Seek to understand each other, not to correct each other. If something in your partner’s attitude bothers you, tell them how you feel and why. See if you can find a compromise. But if you have the urge to “fix” them, you’re better off to put a sock in it!
As the visionary psychiatrist Carl Jung noted, “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
3. Come Clean About Money Past and Present
We talk about old heartthrobs and the stupid things we did as kids, right? We’ve made mistakes in all areas of our lives, so why should money be any different? If you have past money skeletons in the closet, bring them out without over-dramatizing them.
And if you have current skeletons, bring them out as well! Hiding income, assets, spending or debt from your partner now will only cause bigger problems down the road.
One study found that a full one-third of couples had not been completely honest about financial issues with their partner. Two-thirds had arguments as a result, and nearly half said financial secrecy and dishonesty (isn’t it really financial infidelity?) created less trust in their relationships.
The consequence was even more severe for some: More than 25 percent of couples who had been dishonest about money split up or divorced.
Tip: ‘Fess up. As uncomfortable as it might be now, revealing whatever you’re hiding will be much less traumatic than being caught later!
Increasing Intimacy and Harmony by Reducing Financial Stress and Worry
When you add guarantees and predictability to your financial plan, it reduces financial stress and worry. So does eliminating debt to financial institutions (one of the biggest causes of financial stress).
The Bank On Yourself safe wealth-building strategy lets you bypass Wall Street to grow wealth safely and predictably every single year – no matter what’s happening in the stock market or the economy. It’s never had a down year in more than 160 years.
And it lets you fire banks and finance companies and become your own source of financing. You get access to the money you need when you need it, no questions asked. And you can pay it back on your own schedule, without worrying about late fees, collection calls or exorbitant interest charges.
Why not find out how adding the Bank On Yourself method to your financial plan can reduce stress, which will result in both financial peace of mind and greater intimacy and relationship harmony?
Take the next step and request your free, no-obligation Analysis here right now.
You’ll know the guaranteed minimum value of your nest egg on the day you want to tap into it… and at every point along the way. And you’ll love the feeling of empowerment you get when you tell banks and finance companies to go take a hike!